STARS IN THEIR EYES

       The lives of personal assistants to Thaicelebrities
       Ever wanted to live the celebrity lifestyle without the hassle of being recognised in public? In the US of A, this troublesome dilemma is easily solved by the celebrity personal assistant (PA).In the States - home to more celebs per head of population than anywhere else in the world, according to Gurupedia - a PA's duty is to handle tasks ranging from shopping to arranging appointments,to taking their client's chihuahua outside to poo.
       PAs get to go to parties, receive pretty presents, a relatively high salary (an average of USD$64,000-100,000[B2.2m-3.4m] according to The Guardian )and a chance to meet all the cool people they idolise on the silver screen.
       The downside of it all of course is that some celebrities have borderline psychological behaviour issues. Some of the bizarre outbursts that American stars make when on tour, or on the Internet, really blow your mind away as you are forced to ask,"Is this really how an adult is supposed to behave?"
       According to celebrity gossip website theimproper.com, Jennifer Lopez's outrageous demands on tour have included that her hotel suite be painted white, decked with matching white lilies and roses, and white candles burning with the essence of her favourite perfume, Diptyque (more like dipstick, right?). She also required bed sheets with Egyptian cotton of over 250 thread-count and the room temperature set to exactly 25.5 Celsius.
       Are Thai stars this awesome? Are our celebrities this insane? We asked some people well placed to answer, PAs to the Thai stars.
       Working so closely with celebrities, you must receive some great benefits right? Pupe:When we work as a team it gives us a fulfilling feeling, especially when you see your little stars grow into fully fledged celebrities. It's quite heartwarming. Travelling around with the stars to different countries is also fun. The job is very unpredictable and exciting. Weeks are never the same. Travelling? That's awesome! You must get to go to all the hot locations like Monaco,Dubai and The Bahamas right?Pupe:The job has taken me to Hong Kong, Laos, Singapore and Japan. Laos? Err, cool... I guess I was thinking that it would be more of a jetsetter lifestyle...Ke:Once, several of my clients simultaneously required my help and they were all in different parts of the country. I had to organise their schedule for work and for their personal lives. Over three days I visited every region of the country, getting very little sleep. I also have a team that helps me and it was a very busy time. The schedule can get messy but I love my job. I see. You said the job is heartwarming. What about the diamond-studded underwear or a free house? Ton:This job makes you a more responsible person. I get to go to all the events and concerts. Since I joined the company I have been to a few thousand. The networking you get out of this job is also great since you meet a lot of people.Ke:Working for my own company, I really get close to my clients as if they were like family.On my birthday I get presents from them and that gives me a very warm feeling.Sometimes they even buy me a plane ticket so that I can travel on holiday with them. What about all the love triangles between beautiful people? I bet you get all the gossip,and can sell it to the papers huh, wink, wink? Pupe:In my job, you become the middleman between the press, your celebrity and their parents. A nightmare scenario involves all three parties pressuring me at once and that can be very stressful.
       Err, that's not exactly what I meant. What about nightmare scenarios? You probably have to deal with all kinds of crazy situations right? Ton:Now that I am in a managerial position it is not that bad. I have a steady schedule where I get proper weekends like everyone else. I wouldn't say I have any nightmare scenarios but dealing with tabloids talking about your stars dating can become quite a chore. Does Thailand have any cases of the American diva syndrome? Has a Thai celebrity ever demanded that they have an entire bathtub filled up with ice cream cones heated to exactly 38.5 Celsius, for example?Pupe:At a recent project, Tata Young requested that she use her own microphone. Wow, thats hardcore! Was it a one-of-a-kind gold-plated microphone? Pupe:I think she just wanted her own microphone because it sounded better than the available one, but that was about it. She even shared her dressing room with her dancers.Usually we just try our best to make our stars feel comfortable before a performance and it doesn't involve the levels you see in the American entertainment industry.Ton:I can't really think of any situations like that. Our artists usually request refreshments and food for their dressing rooms but no one has ever asked for something out of the ordinary. Refreshments? What like million dollar bottles of Cristal champagne to spray on all the naked groupies?Ton:Oh no, we don't allow our stars to have alcohol at events. From these interviews we can conclude that Thai celebrities are nowhere near as insane as their American counterparts. This can be attributed to two possible factors:1) Our celebrities simply don't possess as much of the insanity gene; or 2) Maids are cheap to hire in Thailand. Here, just about anyone with a reasonable income - celebrity or not - can already live like Mariah Carey by hiring legal immigrants and paying them - at least minimum wage.
       While American celebrities are like five-year-olds that have discovered their father's platinum card, thanks to their straight talking PAs we can see that Thai dara are infinitely more human than we could have imagined. Who would have thought it?